I get it. Introverts need time at home. That's how they recharge their batteries. I am an extrovert. My batteries get recharged by being around people I like. In theory, this should be no problem.
BUT IT'S A BIG PROBLEM...
But only because I ATTRACT introverts.
About 98% of my friends describe themselves as introverts. While I understand what makes an introvert tic, it's VERY difficult for me not to get my feelings hurt. I like my friends. I want to spend time with them. I want to dooooooooo stuff with them. I'm not even picky about what we do!But because they are introverts & need to recharge at home, I get a lot of nos. As an extrovert, these nos scream out 'I don't want to be your friend.'
I know that is not the message my friends are trying to send me, but repeated nos send that message. (At least I think I know...maybe it is the message they are trying to send me.) I'm not saying it's not ok for introverts to stay home & recharge. I do totally get it. I even have my moments when I just want to be home. But if the answer I most often get is no... It makes it really difficult to know whether or not I'm getting the brush off. Eventually I just quit trying, because continued nos translate to 'they don't like me' in the extroverts mind.
So my dear introverted friends, I'm sorry I annoy you with my repeated requests to dooooooo things. With people. With you, because I like you. I'm sorry. I honestly don't know how to make this better. In the same way that introverts say 'it's who I am,' I have to say 'it's who I am.'
Maybe I need to make a bigger pool of friends, so that I always have people to hang out with?!?!? Sigh.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
3 comments:
Yeah I get frustrated with the introverted friends. So "going out" for me = going over to hang out and sit on their couch. And watch tv. For hours. I like relaxing and putting my feet up as much as the next person but not for 12 hours straight on my day off! I feel like the day is wasted, not a single productive thing took place and sometimes that's okay but not all the time. I sit in my office all day. Sometimes, all I want in the world is to DANCE!... but really, just stand for a little, interact with other human life. God gave Eve to Adam so that he wouldn't be lonely. We were put on earth to help each other not isolate ourselves!!!
.....End Rant
<3 <3 I tend to want to go dooo things too. It usually includes the bar next door, but that's just because I like bars. They are safe to me. I'm not picky even about what I do though. Bowling, fishing, skating, a movie... I don't care. But people not wanting to hang out with me, because they need to recharge, really does hurt my feelings. I try not to let it, but it does. It says 'you aren't worth my time' and 'I don't care about your needs.' I hate that I take it that way. I hate it. But it is what it is.
I know it's hard, but try not to take it personally. we all have our different ways of unwinding. I even had to learn that with my boyfriend who is the biggest extrovert I know! But since he works all day on his feet and I work all day in a chair, our ideas of unwinding from the day will be polar opposites and you just have to find a happy medium that you both enjoy.
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