Friday, December 14, 2007

What do you do?

I had a funny thought just now as I was cleaning my office and rearranging furniture... every time my world begins to spin out of control I clean my office and rearrange furniture. Why is this? Then I started to think back to the day before my job... my solution then was to shop... I think cleaning my office might be the more responsible way to handle stress. On some level, cleaning my office and rearranging furniture is me controlling my life in the only way I know how... I mean, there is so much happening right now that is puzzling... the one thing I can control is where my desk is in my office. What do you do when your world is spinning around you???

You might be wondering what has thrown me into such a cleaning freenzy... I had a meeting with my dean and the VP yesterday. For the 08-09 school year I am being dropped down to 3/4 time. I will still have benefits, but it will be a $8000 pay cut. They seemed so excited when they told me that the other person that I work with would be 3/4 time as well, but they don't seem to realize how this affects my life. I don't really care that the 65 yr old woman that I work with who retired from the public schools will still have a job... I care about the fact that a pay cut of 800$ a month will financially damage my family. In fact, about the time that all of this will take place is about the time my loans will come due, so instead of being 800$ short a month we will be about 1600$ short a month. I care about the fact that this decision brings into question what will happen the next year... should RT even continue school??? I mean, he'd have 60 hrs and then I wouldn't have a job if all goes as it seems it is going to. So many questions...

Anyway, on top of the house issue (see below) and the questions I have there I now get to add this to my list. I seriously would like one year where there were no freakin' complications. Is that too much to ask? I know that God has a plan... I really do... and I know that everything happens for a reason, but as I sit here in my office crying once again I can't seem to figure out what it is. Is this God's way of telling me to get out of the education field? I mean, it has truly been an uphill battle, so maybe it isn't where I'm supposed to be. Who knows? Anyway, pray for my family as we try to figure this out!

1 comment:

Shelley said...

I think I am a frantic cleaner, too! Hope all works out for you. Just live one day at a time :)